ShadowShot : L'enfant Guerrier Read online

  I said, “But Father, what would you do without me? Who will help you?”

  “After you’ve left I will take another wife. The Madam, for her own reasons, does not wish to have you come till you’re 18, which won’t be long from now.”

  I did not have to think about it. I would go to Paris.

  Then I said, “Father, may I sleep with you tonight?”

  In the letter my mother had said that my father was a man who knew how to please a woman. It was true. You are the only man Jack that has given me more pleasure sexually then he did. He was able to teach me much. He no doubt saved me from exactly what my parents feared; that I would become pregnant and work in the fields for the rest of my life. During the last six months before I left for Paris, I believe our coupling kept my father alive longer. A year after I left, he died of a broken heart from missing my mother.

  The Madam was true to her word and helped me in every way possible. I never once was allowed to see the inside of the brothel. She told me that my father was the only man she ever loved. He was also the best lover she ever had. They had known each other since they were seven years old and first made love when they were teenagers. She told me at first she didn’t understand how my father could fall in love with my mother, but she wanted him to be happy and he was.

  In time the Madam legally adopted me and made me her beneficiary, as she had no children of her own. Between my father’s and the Madam’s counseling, I learned how to give and receive pleasure without being foolish.

  I took her in my arms and kissed her eyes and said, “Sophia my love, thank you for sharing that with me. I do not hold your past against you in any way. I still don’t understand what your story has to do with us.”

  She looked at me, took another deep breath and said, “My mother was 25 years older than my father. They married when my father was still young. It killed him when she died of old age. He could never take another wife. Don’t you see Jack? It doesn’t work. It’s not meant to be.”

  “Sophia, I understand your reluctance better now, but that was then. This is now. The situation is different. We’re two different people. I love you. I want to be with you. I don’t care about anything else. I want to marry you Sophia if you will have me. Or if you don’t wish to be married, we can live together. It would be enough for me.”

  “Did you never want children Jack? You might want them someday.”

  “No never. Did you?”

  “I never regretted the time with my father, but the ironic part was that I was always barren and never could have had children even if I wanted to. Which I did not.”

  I took her in my arms and held her close to me. She pressed her head against my chest.

  “My love, this has been the best month of my life. I ask only that we spend another month together or as long as you want. At the end of that time, if you still feel that we could not make a life together, then I will respect and abide by your wishes and go my own way. Please keep an open mind and heart, and if it’s really not meant to be, then we part company with a goodbye and a kiss.”

  She looked up into my face and said, “This last month, I have never been happier in my entire life either. It will only make it harder on both of us if we stay together longer. But if it’s your wish my wonderful Jack, then I’m yours, but only if you promise me at the end of the month you’ll let me go.”

  “You have my word Sophia.”

  “Make love to me now Jack please.”

  I picked her up and carried her to the bed. That night while lying in bed I thought to myself, I had hoped for a yes, but didn’t really expect it would be that easy. I already anticipated her worries but the story of her childhood would be hard to overcome. I could not fault her for her concerns. Everything she said made perfect sense, but the only thing that mattered to me was how she made me feel, which was more alive than I had ever been, or knew that I could be.

  If our first month together had been a fantasy then our second month was interstellar. The only difference being by the end of the second month my life could go back to being what it was. I tried to keep that out of my thoughts. It wasn’t that difficult, because with every moment of every hour, life with Sophia was a whirlwind of laughter, adventure, and romance extraordinaire. My hope was that I could quell her fears, and show her by my actions that we could make it work or in Latin, Acta Non Verber (deeds not words). The beautiful thing was that I didn’t have to try and make everything special. Everything I said or did seemed to come perfectly naturally.

  Including the time that Sophia and I dated in Paris, this was the longest I had ever been with one woman. It was as if I was finding myself for the first time.

  One day at lunch she asked me, “Jack will you go back to work for George?’’

  ‘‘No I don’t think so, I’m done with that. Although I do miss the money.’’

  ‘‘Then what will you do?’’

  ‘‘I’m not sure. I have my properties and a few small investments and a fair amount of cash put away, I heard two can live as cheaply as one, especially if they both start out with a little capital.’’

  “It was very kind of you to offer to give me $10,000 startup. I have some money put away also, and I own an apartment in Paris that is paid for.”

  “Let’s just say hypothetically that you’re such a silly little thing you don’t let me captivate you, what would you do?”

  “Good question. I’m not really sure I know. I wouldn’t go back to work for the Company, at least not at the same job. I really don’t know. Have you considered going freelance again?”

  “Baby, I am not into it. That’s why I quit in the first place.”

  “Forgive me for saying so, but you seemed like you were into it back in Sydney.”

  “Well darling that was different. I was putting my life on the line to save you. I must admit it’s not every day that a gallant man can have a duel in the sun and put away two desperados with his lightning speed quick draw.”

  “You are my hero my love. I never had a hero before. I adore you.”

  “Sophia I will always be there for you. It’s interesting though. The first time I did a job for George he asked me if I was into it, how I felt. My answer was the same as it is now. It was a rush, but now I don’t want to do it anymore.”

  The end of the second month came all too quickly. We had a special candlelight dinner and went back to our bungalow. To tell the truth, I was dreading asking her what she had decided. I knew if she said yes I would be airborne. If she said no I would be taking a dive like I had never experienced before. I braced myself. We were sitting on the deck. The bungalow was up on stilts. The moon was full and we could hear the surf. It would be a beautiful night, a place to hear a woman tell you that she loved you, and wanted to spend the rest of her life with you.

  “Jack, you’re the only man I’ve ever known that I completely trust. I believe everything you say to me. I’ve never felt more loved or cared for in my entire life. I love every single thing about you. I know that you truly believe that our age difference would not make a difference to you. You say that now but your feelings might change some day. I know it would make a difference to me.”

  I thought to myself, oh God here it comes.

  “Jack my beautiful darling lover, I can’t do that to you. I can’t do it to myself. I’m sorry.”

  She broke down completely and started weeping. I held her close to me, our foreheads pressed against each other. I felt like I had been gutted. I tried to stay tough but my face started to crinkle up till I couldn’t hold it in. Our tears ran together.

  I don’t know how long we stood there holding each other, weeping. She just kept saying Jack over and over while I said Sophia again and again, until we had no more tears to cry.

  I said, “I’m sorry baby. I couldn’t hold it in.”

  She kissed me and said, “Oh Jack my warrior, I love that you’re so sensitive with me.” There was nothing else we could say.

  “Sophia what do you s
ay that I drag the mattress out here on the deck and we sleep under the stars tonight?”

  “What a marvelous idea. I’ll help you.”

  When we finished our bottle of wine she reached over and took my hand. I somehow didn’t think she would want to make love again on our last night.

  She surprised me by saying, “Jack will you make love to me one more time please?”

  Our lovemaking that night was different than ever before. I felt there was no lust what so ever involved. It was in slow motion it seeming to take hours. We kissed and caressed every inch of each other’s bodies. This was perfect love - the ultimate lovemaking, the act of giving pleasure to the one you truly loved.

  That night just before we fell asleep holding each other, she whispered in my ear, “There will never be anything again like this for me.”

  “Nor for me my love.”

  The next morning over breakfast Sophia said sleeping under the stars was wonderful. We both wished we had thought of it sooner.

  “Well darling you could always give me a temporary stay of execution for a few nights.”

  We both laughed.

  We made our travel arrangements. Sophia would fly to Paris by way of Amsterdam. I just asked for the next flight to the United States. The agent said the next flight would be to New York. That was fine with me. We had talked about the possibility of getting together occasionally, but I could tell she was afraid it would be too hard on her if not on me. I said, “We could always consider the possibility of being a hip hit couple working together. Or how about a very private, private eye couple working together.”

  Sophia you will always be my queen, my goddess of the night. If you ever want me or need me I will come.

  Then we parted, possibly forever.

  25

  MISHA

  When I bought my ticket I asked the agent for first-class, and preferred not to sit next to anyone. I would buy the seat next to me if necessary. She said first-class was only half-full and that I could sit alone. When the plane took off I felt like I’d left my heart and my soul on the ground. How could something as beautiful as being in love bring so much pain? It was insane. We loved each other and yet we couldn’t be together because of an age difference. Was there no way around it? People were torn apart because of war even family differences. When two people are so compatible, how can an age difference be enough to separate them?

  I didn’t know what I was going to do or even where I was going. It all looked pretty damn bleak without Sophia. I tried to think of something I could’ve said or done to change her mind. There was nothing. I thought about the last thing I said to her, how if she ever wanted me or needed me I would come. Not if I could come, but that I would come. But what if I was in a relationship or married even, could I drop everything and go because she called? That must be what Sophia meant when she life changes and so do people. I started to realize that Sophia was a lot smarter than I was.

  I had to snap out of this. I had to stop feeling sorry for myself. I was a survivor and I had to survive. I just had the two most incredible months of my life with the most fantastic woman. And then it hit me. I had handled it all wrong. By being the lovesick puppy no matter how beautiful our time together was, it scared her even more. I should’ve just left it at let’s plan to see each other again or something like that. Hell I don’t know what I’m talking about.

  There was a very attractive dark skinned black haired beauty that was my stewardess. I must’ve looked awfully depressed because she was very kind and attentive. A little while after lights out, she saw that I still had my light on and came over and asked if she could get me anything. I couldn’t sleep and said sure why not another glass of wine. When she brought it over she very coyly asked if she could sit down next to me.

  I said, “Be my guest.’

  She introduced herself and came right out and said, “You’re not feeling very well are you?”

  I said, “I guess it’s pretty obvious.”

  She nodded and said, “Only a woman can do that to a man.”

  “How did you know that?”

  “Oh women have a way of knowing these things.” Then she laughed and said, “Actually I saw you saying goodbye to a very lovely lady. I could feel your pain. I just went through a very hard divorce myself.”

  Talking to her helped me get my mind off Sophia. She would go check on her passengers and then come back and we would talk some more.

  “Jack it’s been nice meeting you. I’ve enjoyed talking to you. I’ve been pretty lonely. You have a layover and you don’t fly till tomorrow night. I don’t have to work tomorrow. I have a small apartment near the airport. Would you like to spend the night with me?”

  God I couldn’t believe it, here was this beautiful exotic woman asking me to spend the night with her because she’s lonely. I just didn’t feel that I could be there for anyone else now. Wouldn’t that be some kind of betrayal of feelings to jump into the rack the next night? I was sure that there wasn’t a single day in Sophia’s life when she wasn’t hit on at least 10 times. I could be certain that some gentlemen would offer himself up to her on a silver platter before Paris, but would she accept him to help forget me? I doubted it.

  I told Misha, that any other time I would be honored. She was beautiful and I didn’t understand how any man could not do everything in his power to stay married to her, but I was in no shape to be with her now.

  She said she understood of course, but it would be okay with her if we just held each other in the night and have a nice time the next day. Well this wasn’t what I wanted. This was the way it had to be for Sophia. I guess I’m just a dog, but they say every dog has his day. So I said yes.

  We took a taxi back to her place and talked for awhile. We were both pretty tired. She put on some silk pajamas. I left my shorts on, and we climbed into bed. She asked me to please just hold her. She was young and beautiful but she wasn’t my Angeline from Paris or my Sophia from Australia. We fell asleep holding each other. I can’t say that it didn’t feel good, but it was enough for me to just leave it at that. However, in the middle of the night I woke to her kissing me and I lost all resolve.

  In the morning she made a nice breakfast and she showed me around the city. Then we went back to her place to make love again. She thanked me for coming home with her. Can you imagine that? We exchanged addresses if ever, and I was off to New York. When we were making love last night, I don’t know whom Misha was thinking of. But I was thinking about Sophia.

  I tried to make myself feel bad about my indiscretion. But it was nothing more than two people comforting each other, both grateful. It didn’t change anything. I was in for a hard road.

  I thought I’d spend a week or two seeing the sights in New York. I wasn’t ready to go home and be lonely. Of course my horses and dogs waited for me. A ride in the mountains was a great way to clear my head but I wasn’t quite ready yet.

  26

  GEORGE CALLS SOPHIA.

  George sat at his office desk staring at the phone, thinking to himself that it was time to make the call. The phone rang. She picked it up.

  The voice on the other end said, “Can you call me back within 30 minutes?”

  She said, “Yes,” and hung up. She didn’t have to ask who it was. She threw on her jacket and went downstairs to the pay phone.

  “Hello Sophia, you are well, I trust?”

  “I’m all right George. How are you?”

  “As well as always. So it seems like your rescue worked out.”

  “Have you heard about any repercussions George?”

  “No nothing that I know of. The police assumed it was a gangland hit. Since you hadn’t broken any laws they thought you were either buried someplace out there or took the opportunity to disappear. His lieutenant was grateful for the opportunity to step into his place. He had no relatives to speak of, so no vendettas. I would say it all came off quite nicely, especially the quick draw gunfight.”

  “Wait a minute George, how di
d you know about that? There was no one there.”

  “Well actually my dear, Jack wasn’t the only one in disguise.”

  “The old couple in the truck!”

  “Very good. You are quick Sophia. I had stationed them up the road in the trees. The plan was to follow you when you drove past. They already knew where Jack’s second vehicle was hidden. They had previously followed him so they knew his route too.”

  “Don’t you think that was taking a big risk? Jack could’ve been killed. There were three of them.”

  “We didn’t know of course that your boyfriend would pick up the trail. That was unexpected. I only had my people in position as a precaution. The old couple were equipped with sniper rifles plus I had another man there who none of you noticed. He was behind you with a sniper rifle. You both handled it brilliantly. I wish I could’ve been there to see the gunfight. The old couple was supposed to stay back. They drove up on their own initiative. No need, just professional admiration. Of course they were severely reprimanded.”

  “They should’ve been. What if Jack had decided not to let them live to be witnesses?”

  “Oh Sophia please. He would never do something like that. Besides if it had come close to that they would have identified themselves.”

  “You didn’t let that slip did you George? You wanted me to know. Why? Why didn’t you just have your team rescue me? Why involve Jack?”

  “First of all the Company was not involved. I used my own money and my own connections to back up Jack. To answer your question I did it because I really care about him and I want to keep him safe as I do you. And since I know you’re not going to let me off the hook, because I wanted to bring the two of you together. From what I understand you had a wonderful time together.”

  “You mean you had us followed all the time?”

  “Protected, Sophia, in case anyone was coming after you.”